Wednesday, December 21, 2011


December 21, 2011

First off, let’s sum up: I am a brave snake whom a local church elder wants the Arabs to kill. I’m ignorant. I need a history lesson and I observe a bankrupt culture. How much more worthless can one be?
What I’ve learned in writing this column is that it’s not okay to call for hatemongers to restrain themselves, for doctor-killers to lay down their arms or for folks to become more skeptical.
Constraint and moderation are dirty words. I never knew that. Reasonable Republicans are no better than Obama, I’m advised. When I call for peace on earth I’m an extremist.
It’s not kosher to wish non-Christians a Happy Christmas. This holiday is exclusive. Keep Jesus and Santa away from those ugly unbelievers.
How come I didn’t know the Nazis were lefties (was it because they weren’t?). And boy, was I wrong about those Sarah Palin rallies. I’m now instructed that the communists and socialists were behind all that anger, not the folks who showed up armed, calling for our president to be assassinated. And it’s perfectly fine to issue death threats against him or Democrats even though that would be a terror crime netting you five years in the pokey.
I‘m told that Palin fans who spat on black congressmen were not being violent regardless of Georgia law that classes it as battery. And a likely felony too, because it’s also a hate crime.
How do I know all these things? From the letters of certain readers of this newspaper.
Jim Burleson wants me to be “slaughtered” in Syria. I bear you no malice, Sir, and I forgive you for knew not what you wrote; when you penned that veiled threat you weren’t in control of your emotions. You’re a leader at your church, the Summit, so I assume that you’re normally a man of peace and piety. In this time of goodwill I will pray for you.
I bless them that curse me (Luke 6:27-31 KJV).
Local republican chairman Roy Roberts calls me a “looney” and a snake. He implies I’m a Godless heathen and then accuses me of the very thing he’s doing. I would read the rest of this gentleman’s undeserved obloquy but I can’t find my glasses.
I know you are but what am I? (apologies to Pee Wee Herman). No, no, I think I’ll leave the name-calling to the infants. However: “Lai shuo shi fei zhe - bian shi shi fei ren”. Ancient Chinese proverb: What Peter says about Paul tells more about Peter than Paul (I didn’t know there were ancient Chinese guys named Peter or Paul).
Mike Crone, local tea party secretary, calls me “brave” for writing this column while surrounded by conservatives. What, Sir, are you saying exactly?
In an astounding reversal, Fox News, the corporate propaganda channel, now supports our president and the lefties. I never knew that, but it’s what Mr Crone boldly declares in his letter. So the fierce Obama-bashing we see on Fox is just a ploy? Wow! That’s some artful dodge, pretending day-in-day-out that you loathe the guy when in fact you’re backing him. I’m not sure I could keep up such a masquerade for one minute.
Mr Crone, who is unaware the Nazis sent their enemies the Socialists to the death camps, wants to teach me history. If I might please politely decline...
Call me a nose-in-the-air head-in-the-sand know-it-all stick-in-the-mud fuddy-duddy or call me Brash Brit, but I still prefer the old ways: honesty, integrity, doing the right thing, and open, civilized discussion...
Instead, I’ve seen in this newspaper ad hominem attacks on my fellow journalists from some in the community who ought to act more like Southern gentlemen.
“Robbie Schwartz, your liberalism is showing.” What, like “your fly is open”? Worse than that? And anyway, so what! As though liberalism is something to be ashamed of, embarrassed about. Quite the opposite, Mr Bob Hunt. Liberalism is compassion, caring for others, loving thy neighbor. All the Christian things.
Loganville tea partygoer Donald Ashworth wants to see my lip buttoned; he’s written demanding this column be canceled because it’s “trash”. Hey, Wehner’s not saying what I’m saying so shut him up!
I don’t think that’s quite how it works, squire. And I wish folks wouldn’t distort my words and then attack me for something they themselves just fabricated.
This is America, so I hope our good folk will continue to write in. Because this newspaper is a perfect open forum for y’all’s ideas and counter-ideas that could improve our country and our county. Disagree, by all means. But it’s Christmas, so c’mon guys, easy on the name-calling, it’s so unproductive.
There are no snakes on the Walton Tribune. Just journalists who seek the truth and report and comment on developments as they see them for the benefit of the community.
Nothing is really that complicated, although it does require a bit of our time to unravel the web of confusion spun so deliberately and expertly by the forces that seek to rein in our freedoms.
So, friends and nay-sayers, do make your point as long as it’s based on straight facts and rational argument, not just slogans and insults. Simply parroting Fox News without checking isn’t good enough. People echo Limbaugh and O’Reilly. They quote Hannity, Boortz, Beck...
I wish they would just quote themselves.


© 2011 Fred Wehner is a journalist formerly with the Daily Mail in London, who then founded and ran the New York News Agency before settling in Monroe 21 years ago.